Dying
by OutcastsAmongOutcasts
Summary: Merlin is infected with a disease that eats away at his magic and life. With a limited time to live and growing weaker by the day, he lives out his final months of life. Oneshot.


Merlin was dying.

Gaius had diagnosed him with a rare magical disease that slowly ate away at his magic and then his life. He only had three months (12 weeks) to live.

Arthur didn't know what to do nor did any of Merlin's other friends. They didn't know whether to just ignore it or treat Merlin like it was his last days.

The warlock certainly didn't want them to treat him any different. He went straight back to business after Gaius had diagnosed him like nothing had ever would have none of that.

"You're sick, Merlin," Arthur said bluntly when he found Merlin practicing a few spells from a book he had gotten from an allying kingdom in his chambers.

Merlin didn't look at Arthur, "You think I don't know that?"

"You shouldn't be working, Merlin," Arthur told him calmly.

"Well, you did give me this job, sire," Merlin retorted half-heartedly.

The King narrowed his eyes at the former manservant, "You know what I mean, Merlin. You can't pretend like nothing's happened."

Merlin turned at to the King, his face stony and hard. "Why can't I?" He asked angrily, "You think I don't know that I only have three months to live? You think I don't know that my magic, the one thing that makes me actually useful, is being eaten away at?" Tear were brimming Merlin's eyes and his voice started to break, "Y-you think I want to think about that? Well, you're wrong, sire. I would rather live my life while I still have it." The angry warlock turned his back on the king and went back to studying the felt a hand go to his shoulder but he didn't react.

"It's okay, Merlin," Arthur whispered.

Merlin shook his head angrily, "No, it's not, Arthur. Imagine that your fighting ability was taken away from you little by little. Something you've had your entire life, the one thing you were good at, and it's taken away. Without magic, Arthur, I'm nothing but a pathetic, defenseless manservant. I might as well die."

Arthur grabbed the warlock's shoulders and twisted him around so that he was facing him. He stared into his blue eyes and said, "No, Merlin, you're so much more. You're my brother. I would willingly die for you without hesitation and I will do everything in my power to find a cure for this mysterious disease. I give you my word."

Merlin nodded and he smiled weakly. Arthur pulled him into an embrace and held tightly, not wanting to let go of the man he considered the little brother he never had. They came out of the embrace and Arthur ruffled Merlin's black hair.

"Now, why don't you try to teach me a few spells," Arthur requested.

Merlin furrowed his eyebrows at the King, "You? Learn magic? I don't know, Arthur. This is some hard stuff. Stick to your swordplay."

"Oh, come on, Merlin," Arthur rolled his eyes, "If an idiot like you can do it, it can't be that hard."

The warlock snickered, "Okay, then, if you can get three spells by tomorrow night, I'll be the court jester the next time there's a feast. And, when you lose, you'll have to wear one of Gwen's dresses around Camelot for a day."

"You're on, Merlin," Arthur punched Merlin softly in the arm and they got to studying. A few days later, Arthur could be seen around Camelot wearing Guinevere's dress. He actually had managed to get 2 out of the 3 spells, but Merlin gave him a really hard spell. Idiot.

-Two weeks later-

"No, Gwaine, I really don't want to go to the tavern," Merlin pleaded as the burly knight dragged him along with him to the local tavern.

"Nonsense, mate, it'll do you a world of good," Gwaine dragged his friend on.

They arrived at the tavern and Gwaine ordered them drinks. Merlin sipped at his, not fancying a hangover in the morning while Gwaine drank the whole tankard in one go.

Gwaine ordered another drink then pointed to three women sitting in the corner of the bar, "Pretty, huh? Watch how the master picks 'em up."

The nearly drunk knight walked smoothly over to the ladies and smiled a winning smile.

"If I were rearrange the alphabet," Gwaine started smoothly to one of the girls, "I'd put 'U' and 'I' together."

The woman angrily stood up and smacked Gwaine across the face screaming, "I don't know to read!"

Gwaine rubbed his cheek as he retreated back to the laughing Merlin. "I think she likes me," the knight winked.

Merlin laughed even harder.

"Why don't you go try your hand at it, mate?" Gwaine suggested.

The warlock's expression instantly became dark and haunted and he took another gulp out of his mead. "I can't really fall in love now, Gwaine," Merlin explained. "I've only got two months to live."

Gwaine nodded sadly, "That's alright. Hey, more for me, right?"

Merlin chuckled, "Right, Gwaine."

Gwaine put on his winning smile, side hugged Merlin, and called for more drinks. By the end of that night, both the Knight and the Warlock were singing karaoke and dancing on the tables. They laughed and sang and forgot everything else in the world for just a bit. Gwaine was right, it was exactly what Merlin needed.

-Two weeks later-

Merlin, Arthur, and Gwen went out riding for the day, just for some fun. Merlin was slowly getting weaker and it was just starting to show. He could no longer get on his horse on his own and would get winded from just running up the stairs. It hurt Guinevere to see this happening to him, so she suggested some fresh air and demanded Arthur go with them to ride horses together. Relaxing.

That is, until a random set of bandits attacked them. They were defending themselves easily. Merlin was using his magic and Gwen and Arthur were fighting using their swords. Really, they were having no issue.

Merlin held out his palm to send a bandit flying but nothing happened. He tried again with the same result. Nothing. He tried a spell. No dice. The bandit laughed and lunged at the warlock. Merlin dodged the attack easily but the sword swiped his leg at the last second and sent him to the ground. Arthur killed the bandit just as he was about to slice Merlin into two. The last of the bandits were either dead or ran for the hills.

"Are you okay, Merlin?" Gwen asked as she ran over to them.

The warlock was staring at the ground not willing to look up. He felt like a pathetic, defenseless child. His magic had failed him for the first time in his life. Arthur quietly went over to the horses, grabbed a medical pack, walked back, and tended to Merlin's wound. They both knew what had happened and neither of them wanted to believe it.

"What happened?" Guinevere asked looking between her husband and her best friend.

Merlin spoke up, his voice weak. "My magic failed me, Gwen."

They returned back to Camelot in silence and brought Merlin to Gaius.

"What happened?" Gaius asked when he saw his former ward being helped into his chambers by the King and Queen.

"We were attacked by bandits in the forest," Arthur explained.

Gaius nodded his head then tended to the wound himself. Arthur and Gwen left when he was done, leaving Gaius and Merlin alone.

"Is something wrong, my boy?" The Court Physician asked when Merlin wouldn't meet his eyes.

"My magic... failed me, Gaius," Merlin spoke quietly, almost whispered. He looked up at the man he had come to call his father, his eyes wide and pleading, "It failed me Gaius. Never once has it done that. I'm nothing without it. I can't lose it."

Gaius looked at Merlin with pity and regret, "I'm sorry, Merlin. I would never wish this upon my worst enemy. Make the most of what you have left. And don't strain your magic or your body too much."

The warlock nodded, laid back on the cot, and fell into a dreamless, peaceful sleep.

Gaius smiled and he felt tears come to his eyes, "My son."

-One Week Later-

After the accident with the bandits in the forest, Merlin was ordered to stay in the castle, most preferably his chambers. Of course, he had a tendency to disobey the King's orders so Arthur thought ahead and stationed two guards in front of his door to make sure he didn't wander off. It was actually a smart move on Arthur's part. But Merlin would eventually get restless of being locked up in his chambers for a few hours so he'd take a stroll around the castle with Gaius or Gwen or maybe even Arthur if he wasn't busy.

Merlin was still going mad. So, one night, probably around midnight or so, he snuck out of his chambers by distracting the guards. The guards of Camelot had gotten a lot better since Uther's reign, but still easily deceived. Merlin would have to speak to the King about that. The warlock pulled his dark blue cloak over him and descended to the lower town unnoticed. It was almost too easy.

He made his way through the forest knowing the path he took by heart. He was a more than a little winded by the time he reached the clearing, but he didn't care.

Surprisingly Aithusa, would he'd plan on calling, was already there waiting for him. The white dragon had grown and matured a lot over the years. She wasn't as big as Kilgarrah, but she was still pretty giant.

"What are you doing out of bed, Merlin?" Aithusa asked narrowing her blue eyes at him accusingly.

"I needed to get out, Aithusa," Merlin answered. "It's torture being locked up in that damn castle like a prisoner. I wanted to talk to you."

Aithusa nodded and her expression softened, "I've missed you but you shouldn't be walking around the forests at night. You're too weak."

"Well, I'm not staying in my chambers the rest of my short life," the dragonlord snapped. "I don't care if I pass out! I need to breath fresh air every once in awhile."

Aithusa chuckled, "Kilgarrah always did say how much of an idiot you are."

"Cryptic old dragon," Merlin cursed, "Can never give a straight answer, can he?"

"If he just gave you the answer, Merlin, then you'd never learn how to figure things out on your own," the white dragon said wisely.

Merlin raised an eyebrow at the young dragon, "You've been spending too much time with him."

Aithusa laughed, "I'm afraid so."

The dragon and dragonlord sat together and talked the night away. Merlin forgot all about his inevitable death for the few hours he could and just had a great time talking to Aithusa. It felt really great.

After a few hours, though, Merlin decided it was time for him to return to Camelot.

"You're too weak," Aithusa told him sharply, "I can feel it. I will bring you there myself."

"No, Aithusa, imagine how people would react to a dragon randomly landing in the middle of the city," Merlin said.

Aithusa smirked, "We'll see when we get there, now won't we?"

The warlock rolled his eyes, "Fine, you win. But no fire breathing."

Merlin climbed atop the dragon and they took off into the night sky. Aithusa had some fun doing barrel rolls and loops, scaring the warlock but he enjoyed it anyways. The night sky lit up with fire from the dragon as she let out a mighty roar. Merlin didn't have the heart to reprimand her. Aithusa landed on the roof of the castle gently and Merlin climbed off her back. They were laughing uncontrollably and looked rather silly. They had had fun, though.

"I hope to see you again, Merlin," the white dragon told him somberly.

Merlin nodded, "I hope to, also. Next time I get the chance, I'll try to come to you."

"Oh, no you won't," An angry voice came from behind the warlock.

Merlin turned around to see an angry King Arthur shirtless and glaring at him from the entrance to the roof.

"You woke up the entire city, Merlin," Arthur informed him. "We thought we were under attack until we saw Aithusa. What were you thinking, being out of the castle at night? You could've gotten eaten by a wild animal or could've passed out or-"

"I'm fine, Arthur," Merlin told him sternly.

Arthur examined Merlin closely then sighed in defeat, "Fine, we'll talk about this in the morning. Get to bed."

"Yes, sire!" Merlin mock saluted and went down the stairs and Aithusa took off again.

Arthur sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, "I feel like I'm dealing with children."

-Two weeks later-

Merlin was getting worse by the day. He could barely even get out of bed anymore and had to spend his days in his chambers. His magic was next to nothing now and he felt empty without the constant hum of power beneath his skin. He felt weak. He felt... scared.

People would come to his chambers periodically throughout the day and keep him occupied. Gaius would bring his breakfast and check on his health. Gwen would bring his lunch and keep his mind occupied with the latest castle gossip that her maid had told her. Gwaine would come in after training to share his latest and greatest tavern adventure. Arthur would bring him his dinner and tell him about how boring the council meeting was and complain about the stuffy lords he had to deal with and how lucky Merlin was that he didn't have to go to those anymore. He also would ask for some wisdom from the dying warlock. It made his life bearable, but it still was horrible.

This day was different, though. Gwen had brought him his breakfast instead of Gaius and she hardly spoke to him, she just smiled brightly at him. Gwen left quickly and Merlin was left alone. He hated it when he was alone with his thoughts. He didn't have much to think about and really couldn't do much of anything. Around noon there was a knock on the door and a call from outside.

"Merlin," it was Gwen, "you've got a visitor!"

The warlock furrowed his eyebrows together in confusion. Who would want to visit him? The door opened and in stepped Hunith. Merlin smiled and he weakly sat up. His mother rushed over and wrapped her arms around him.

"Oh, Merlin, I've missed you," Hunith gushed, her voice breaking slightly, "Wh-When I got word, I-I came str-straight away. I'm so s-sorry, my son."

Merlin held his weeping mother to him and tears silently started to roll down his face. He had missed his mom deeply and often wished to visit Ealdor but never had the chance. They talked for hours about how their lives had been going. Hunith mothered him, as expected, and Merlin was, for once, glad for the excessive mothering.

When night was falling Hunith reluctantly had to leave to get settled into her chambers.

"Merlin," Hunith turned to her son before she exited his chambers, tears threatening to spill from her eyes, "I'm so proud of you. You are a handsome and wise young man. I couldn't have wished for a better son."

And with that she left.

-Four weeks later-

It was Merlin's final week alive. The previous four weeks had been rather uneventful. Merlin was so weak that he was barely ever awake anymore. It pained Arthur to see his best friend like this. He had failed to find a cure, even though he had search for weeks for one. He had failed Merlin.

Everybody was having a hard time watching Merlin get so skinny and weak. Hunith would go in every chance she got and kept him company, even if he was asleep most of the time. She wanted to be with her son til his dying breath.

It was as if Camelot was holding its breath. Everybody in the kingdom knew of the warlock's health and even kingdoms beyond felt the sorrow. Kings and Queens all around would send gifts and their best wishes to the King and Queen. Dragons' wails could be heard from miles around and it was the most sorrowful you could ever here. It was a dark time for Albion. Everything knew of the warlock and everything was affected by his disease.

-Merlin's last moments-

Merlin lay motionless on the cot in Gaius' chambers. He had requested to be moved there two days previous. He had said that it felt more like home than his own chambers had. Everybody gathered around him. Gwaine, Percival, Leon, Elyan, Gwen, Arthur, Gaius, Hunith, and any servant who could fit themselves inside the doorway. The tension in the air was thick and filled with sadness. Hunith sat on one side of the cot while Arthur sat on the other. Tears fell from their eyes silently. Merlin's breathing and pulse were weak. He was pale and you could see his bones perfectly.

It was complete silence for a few moments as everybody watched the young warlock to do something. After a half an hour of silence, Merlin's eyes slowly opened and he weakly looked around the room and smiled.

"I didn't know I was so popular," he joked, trying to take away the tense atmosphere from the air. Everybody gave a watery smile at the warlock's joke. They had missed those witty remarks from him over the past few weeks. Merlin grew somber though and his eyes filled with tears. He looked at Arthur with such pain and fear in his eyes, it caused the young King's heart to break. He never had seen such hopelessness and raw pain in someone's eyes before, especially Merlin's.

"Arthur," Merlin said weakly, "I-I'm scared. I don't w-want to d-die."

Arthur took his friend's hand and couldn't stop the tears from flowing freely from his eyes when Merlin felt so cold.

Arthur forced a smile on his face, "Don't be so stubborn, Merlin."

Merlin chuckled and looked at his mum. "I love you, mum," he whispered.

Hunith smiled and kissed his forehead lovingly, "I'll always love you, Merlin. You were the best thing that happened to me. I love you, my little warlock."

Merlin nodded and looked at Gwen, "Gwen, you're a great Queen. Don't lose your compassion and kind heart."

Gwen smiled and nodded in response, "I promise, Merlin."

Merlin turned to Gwaine, "Protect the prat for me. God knows he needs it."

"You know it, mate," Gwaine replied giving his signature grin.

"Same goes for Elyan, Leon, and Percival," Merlin looked at each knight. "Be the best there is and stand for what is right." Merlin looked at Gaius, "Thank you for putting up with me all these years. You were the best mentor anyone could have and you were like a father to me, even when I was a total idiot."

"It won't be long til we see eachother again, Merlin," Gaius spoke wisely. Then he smiled, "I wouldn't have traded you for anyone else."

Finally, Merlin turned to Arthur. "Don't be a dollop-head," Merlin told him, causing the King to smile, "You have grown and matured so much since the first time I met you when you were a Prince of the Prats. You have fulfilled destiny. Don't tear all that work down. I put a lot of work into Albion and I don't want it wasted."

Arthur chuckled, "I promise I won't, idiot."

Merlin smiled weakly and lowered his head down onto the cot. He breathed out a puff of pure magic and he stopped breathing. Tears fell from everybody's' faces they all began to sob. Arthur even wept for his friend.

That day, all of Albion wept.

* * *

**AN: Okay, so, this was on my oneshot series known as 'Change' but I decided to pull out some of the oneshots in it and repost them as independent oneshot. Please leave a review and a favorite.**


End file.
